Last Edit June 2, 1999
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I was supposed to be at a BSA court of honor - but my damn son went to sleep in a warm room and would not get up -would not move - would not hurry - so I went 15 minutes late - I had everyone's salad! I also ended up with the salad all week. (Aren't freezer bags great? Oh well. I was supposed to be eating salad anyway.) He was cursing and screaming and telling me to shut up (lack of food, sleepy) abusive. Pissed me off. I don't relate well to that behavior. I dropped off the salad (they were already eating) and the cake and the kid. I left work early to buy the cake and there he was - strolling in late no less - he's the SPL - and I came back home to calm down. Of course the cake came home later as well. Chocolate. Whipped cream. Chocolate is required for stress. It is. It is. What a little pisser. I know that as we wind down to the end of the senior year and he doesn't know if he's going to make it out that the stress is getting to him. I know it is stress - or he would be very very damaged by now. I would kill him. He's carrying 9 classes. Too bad he didn't figure this out last summer and take classes in adult school to lighten his load. He was going to take five years. Changed his mind. Nothing like an about-face with no warning. Something like stopping the Titanic. I also had to go home for my purse and camera. Symptoms of the stress I was under. Doesn't help my diet. * * * * I need to round up his extra credit stuff for history - with luck I will get him out of high school..two more weeks. I hope we both live through this. I got a 47 (out of???) on my English paper! I didn't even disguise it. And the teacher took it!!!!! I will post it as a story later. The teachers for the most part deserve anything I say about them. I am so disgusted with education in this country. I have another story I will post after he is out. "A Day At The High School" from his freshman year. I was there for four hours before they discovered me! And I was carrying a backpack! Never mind that my son had a hurt arm and I was carrying his! Anyway, I did go back to the troop meeting and take one photo of the little monster (who had decided to be a real nut and not eat at all.) (Turns out he was ill.) I have been a supporter and troop committee member for over 15 years. I will be glad to have my life back. Or rather, a different life. Someone said I was gifted. No I am insane! Actually, my big oaf is usually very sweet - but he had a very upset tummy (and didn't tell me) except he finally admitted it driving to school at 6:30AM the next morning and there I was struggling to get Imodium AD Advanced out of my back-saver backpack while driving around corners in suberbia in the van. He could not possibly get the medicine out by himself. Nor open the little packets when I found them. He is a typical man - grouchy as hell when sick, tired or hungry. I have to use a crowbar to get medication into him. Also Typical. He's now in his room (PBS scares him away on Fridays) so I didn't cook - I ate a salad (of course) and wish I hadn't so I had ham slices (lean slices - 8oz worth) thinking I was hungry and wish I hadn't - I think I have the bug too. Great. Holiday weekend. It figures. * * * * I go back for four days next week to assemble a 6-day technical seminar dragging the argumentative engineers out of thier ruts into effective adult education skills - or try to. I think I will have a nervous breakdown of my own. This is the "Pilot" of revamped technical education. Then I have to reshape it into final form by July. This is my other life. I can't write at home when I am banging all day at a computer. My wrists won't allow it. So of course Design Autimation Cafe (www.dacafe.com) put the Bit-Slice book on-line along with my other one on Logic Design for Array-Based Circuits. Neither is 100% complete. So I need to draw art and type like crazy. Because people are reading these books on the web! * * * * I told my tenant they could stay in the house in SD - I will walk thru in late June for repair check. Any excuse to go the San Diego and see the sun. I told my son what an apartment cost in SD ($650) - he stared at me. "That's half my monthly salary!" Haven't heard "I want to move out" since. Someone else warned me about that. It's "I'll move out!" as a threat (why mothers turn gray) until they get 18, then reality checks set in. I am debating. Once he's had enough driving experience...... * * * * I am sewing - and I do need breast reduction surgery - I have to let things out at the top. Three doctors have told me. Can I wait for next Christmas? Can I recover from the last stuff first? My face is still healing! Give me a break! Funny - I used to have to take clothes in at the top. Is this God being funny? I have a standard remark - I will have them reduced and ship the excess to my ex-husband (number 1) - he thought he had been cheated because I was an A-cup. I am trying to get out of D. Fully. Thanks but no thanks. But explain to me why when I make a dress and it's too tight and I have to let out the chest and then make the same dress, same fabric type (different print) and allow or ease the pattern to accommodate what I had to let out on the first dress, the second dress is too big! Can't a girl ever win????? Say that in one breath. * * * * I also walked today. I need to do this every day. Doctor said so. Somehow work gets in the way. But my wrists bother me at times so the Ergo police have ordered me to get out and walk and get up and break every 60 minutes. Good. That'll help. The fact that my new cubicle in the new building is about 500 feet from the nearest printer and I am in the middle of printing tons of stuff........ No wonder I want crackers and peanut butter when I get home! (I know! I am letting the lowfat peanut butter run out. And not buying any more cheese. The crackers are wheat thins. Baked.) The only problem is that if I am out of snack food, I cook! I am letting myself run out of flour...... I've been asked. Yes I have a metal -mesh abdomen - incarcerated hernia - in the story writeups for those of you who are new there are a whole bunch of stories about my son saving my life. Permanent metal sutures. And the things my boys have done to me......Think of chickens.... I now have a waist. Who knew? So sewing should be fun. Can't go up or down much or it will need surgery to flatten out. (puckers) I can loose 20 lbs. That's about it. I am fighting my way back onto my diet. Really. Very hard when there are open bags of chips. Crackers. Hot sauce. Demands for food. Ice cream. I rebel when tired. Got to stop doing that. I have decided that the chinchillas (down to two of them) and the weight machine are to move into the house from the garage. I want them here for days I actually feel motivated. As the sun comes out, I may have those days. God I hate Northern California! Gery. Clouds. Rain. Mist. Cold. I don't want to know it's colder than normal. That does not make me feel good! I am still trying to figure out what having the Chinchillas in the house has to do with the diet....... * * * * I told Fabio I could sew (I always make the dress I see him in) and cook (entered the contest) and he was a bit amazed. What does he normally run around with? Don't answer! That was right after he crawled over the table trying to see if I really was old enough to be his mother! He and his friend had been bemoaning turning 40 (he is 38 , his friend 39) and it had me laughing at them. We don't teach our kids to sew (even the boys had to learn to fix buttons in my class. They have to know this in the military.) We don't teach them to cook. Boil eggs. Make muffins. Bisquits. We don't teach them to shop. Or balance checkbooks. We don't give them music and art appreciation. We don't teach them to appreciate nature. I am speaking about things they should ahve learned in school. That I learned in school. We took this out. And now we wonder what went wrong. Hmmmm. There's a clue. We don't keep kitchen gardens (I haven't grown anything but pumpkins up here.) I don't have much in the way of fruit trees either. The house in San Diego has a lot of them. Especially the plum trees. So I haven't made jelly in a dog's age. I sold the freezer. My Dad used to fill three of them. We have lost that too. Digging stones out with a pick-ax is a great stress-reliever. Beats killing something. * * * * I am waiting for photos of the winner of the ICBINB cooking contest - they promised. And Eric doesn't like me to nag. So I try not to. Unless the TV crews are on my doorstep! THAT he thought was funny. I knew I didn't win the cooking contest - but then, I really didn't expect to. Just had fun doing it. So out of the norm. We must do things like that. Things no one expects. Things out of our routine. It's how we know we are alive. I sent four e-mails and one phone call over the past three weeks to the office. No answer until today I think I annoyed them. I "will be told" when the photos are available....... Oh well. Can't blame a girl for trying. Not when everyone asks. People scolded me for not posting the press release about the cooking contest winner on the 19th! Excuse me! I didn't get the press release until another fan found it and sent me the link. Best I can do. That's as bad as the rider on the roller coaster who went home and logged in to see what had happened...... * * * * I haven't done a current book proposal - not for some time. Too busy to bother at the moment. After June 19th - IF he graduates - I'll be free at last!!!! (Ha! Then start the driving lessons!) I am looking at e-publishing. Jettison (A former Star Trek novel) needs to live. I picked it up in the garage the other day after 10 years and started reading it. Got to page 28. Realized I was hooked on my own book. That book is done. Time to finish another. * * * * And it's spring. So I have about 20 Regency novels to catch up on. How about four hours of sleep? Can I read and drive in traffic? Read while working out? (Actually, that works. Lay down, grasp book firmly. Hold over head. Read while doing leg lifts. You do have to be able to keep some count in the back of your mind. Or have a large bottle of Alieve handy.) * * * * Send for the new Fabio stand-ups. (See the May News page) I did. Pleased me! They are not life sized but are bigger than the dumphead (book promo) I had. Now when I walk into my bedroom I can have a real conniption thinking that there are three men in there. The dump head caused a few palpatations all by itself! Something about that man with his shirt off........ My younger son ran out of the room when they arrived. Normal response. * * * * And Joan Rivers is running a mini series. Oh yes! I just needed that! So I bought purple Victorian pin and earings. For the hell of it. They go on the dress that was too big. It has new seams. I'm fast. The sewing and shopping and reading mean only one thing... I'm getting ready to go to Toronto and the Romantic Times Writer's Convention in September. Got to hug cover models. Got to annoy my children. Met Fabio that way. The Bartling boys will be there. They are big blond hunks too. I know. (I'm a farmer's daughter.) They picked me up while they were in togas. Oh my! Except that my younger son is going with me this time with his cameras. (Back off ladies! He refuses to model! He won't take his shirt off! He will be just barely 18. A YOUNG 18!) Oh this should be good! |
Copyright 1999 Donnamaie E. White. email to dewhite@NOSPAN_best.com