Ballistic JELL-O!

Last Edit August 20, 1999

From Pepper:
I just called the Hallmark shop and asked them to hold one more mug for me. I think they had one more. I had to tell the lady it's the one that says, "Finding a good man is....as easy as nailing JELL-O to a tree."

She remembered me coming in there, instantly.

I was the woman who confessed to being able to: make JELL-O you COULD NAIL TO A TREE!
(and play Frisbee with, and use to put under tires when you're stuck in snow...)

From D:
JELL-O? And the recipe is.......

Are you sure you weren't making Jigglers????

Basic Sugar-Free JELL-O

Is there any other kind? Not for old ladies! However, the non-sugar-free is made the same way - except it comes in two sizes. You really do have the read the box! Basically, the little box uses 2 Cups water TOTAL and the bigger box uses 4 Cups water TOTAL. One-half BOILING and one-half COLD.

1 0.6 oz. Package sugar-free JELL-O
2 Cups BOILING water - heat in a microwave in a glass measuring cup

Put the contents of the JELL-O box envelope into a large glass mixing bowl (or a metal one if that's what you have. It should be able to hold at least 2 quarts.
POUR the boiling water over the JELL-O mix.
WHIP with a wire whisk (the cook's indispensable tool) until the JELL-O granules are dissolved - about 1-2 minutes. If there are a few (a small few) that look to be still hanging around don't sweat it. You want about 98% of them dissolved.

POUR in 2 Cups cold water.
STIR.
POUR into a mold or make it in the glass bowl.
Place into the refrigerator to "set". Soft-set in 1 1/2 hours, firm takes about 4 hours.

Speed-Set

I use sugar-free for this but it also works for the version with sugar (and 70 calories per serving). Uses 1 1/2 Cups BOILING water and 2 1/2 Cups cold water - ice cubes mixed. Soft-set in 1/2 hours (30 minutes), firm in 1 1/2 hours.

Adding Stuff

Once the JELL-O is soft-set (either recipe, about 1 1/2 hours into the regular version), stir in 1 1/2 to 3 Cups of chopped raw veggies or cut-up fruit in the basic sugar-free recipe. You can add things to the sugar version too.

For us impatient types, you can add the fruit at the beginning (after the cold water), but the fruit and stuff will "Settle" to the bottom of the mold. Suits me!

Don't Add These, However

Don't add fresh or frozen pineapple, kiwi, gingerroot, papaya, figs or guava. The JELL-O will not set.

Refreshers

Substitute 2 Cups cold seltzer, club soda, diet carbonated lemon-lime beverage or diet iced-tea for the 2 Cups of cold water in the basic sugar-free recipe.

Or make sugar-free JELL-O with 3 Cups boiling water and 1 Cup cold orange juice.

Playing With Your Food

From http://www.kraftfoods.com/JELL-O/history/ JELL-O

Every April Fools in Eugene, Oregon there is a rather unusual tribute to the most famous gelled substance. "JELL-O-Rama", a.k.a. the JELL-O Art Show, is held at the Maude Kerns Art Gallery and features works by local artists using JELL-O as a medium. Here are some examples from the past few years of JELL-O-Rama

Jigglers - One version

You have children have made this one. It is usually reprinted around Halloween in Mother's magazines.

Prep Time:10 mins.
Skill: No Experience Required
Ready in:3 hrs. 10 mins.
2-1/2 cups boiling water or apple juice (Do not add cold water)
2 packages. (8-serving size) JELL-O Brand Gelatin Dessert, any flavor
Or 4 packages. (4-serving size) JELL-O Brand Gelatin Dessert can be substituted for 2 packages. (8-serving size).

STIR boiling water into gelatin in large bowl at least 3 minutes until completely
dissolved. POUR into 13x9-inch pan.

REFRIGERATE at least 3 hours or until firm (does not stick to finger when
touched). Dip bottom of pan in warm water about 15 seconds. Cut into decorative shapes with cookie cutters all the way through gelatin or cut into 1-inch squares. Lift from pan. With a spatula.
NOTE: Recipe can be halved. Use 8- or 9-inch square pan.

This is JELL-O that is firm. Small children like it because it wiggles in their hands. And mouths.

Jigglers - Another version

4 boxes of JELL-O - all same flavor and color
Make with the amount of hot and cold water needed for ONE BOX.
Stir well - make sure all JELL-O is dissolved in the hot before adding cold water.
Pour into a baking dish - 14x8x2
Chill until very firmly set
Cut into shapes or cubes. Cut all the way through and lift with a spatula.

Halloween Brains

Use 3-4 times the amount of gelatin to make a gelatin mold (just like Jigglers above)
Color it gray using various food colorings.
Use a brain mold (can this you get from a Halloween store).
Chop up red gummy worms and stir in.
Chill till set.

Horrify your neighbors - serve it for Halloween.

Works with reddish food coloring and molds for hearts, kidneys, liver......

Don't forget the segmented Gummy Worms. Red Gummy Worms.

From Pepper:
No. Not Jigglers. I was making regular green jello for a Christmas party and I turned my back for one second and something from space came in and zapped the JELL-O with a laser beam that had a huge G force....(same thing as the dog ate my homework, did this work?)

No, Donnamaie, I am just a very poor cook.

Bill Cosby would sue me for what I do to his JELL-O.

At the very least, he'd get a restraining order that I not come within 25 feet of his product.

From D:
There is no way to screw up JELL-O!!!!!!
Well,..... I take that back.
Once, I put soda in it (that version is still on the boxes), it was suppose to "sparkle" and be fancy and instead it was a mess!
And, I had fruit cocktail in it.
Back when I couldn't afford same.
Actually, I had stuck it in the freezer to "speed set" - this does not work for soda and fruit cocktail - especially when you forget where you put it!

so..... Yes, you can screw up JELL-O!

The mark of a busy creative mind......

Actually, it sounds like you didn't use enough water - and left it in a frost-free refrigerator - which would have sucked even more water out of it. I did that once - old JELL-O in that kind of fridge becomes a glop of goo tougher than the Jigglers.

Persistance! Who knows? Maybe it's a new kind of wall tile. Goes with macaroni and cheese cement patches and overcooked pizza Frisbees.

Drunk JELL-O

You just know someone had to try this!
JELL-O made with Alcohol!: http://www.boston-baden.com/hazel/Jello/#tiddly

The above website has a whole collection of these recipes! I'm considering the one with bourbon in it. The Margarita sounds good too.

A favorite with the boat crowd....And busy Mothers I dare say. Saturday night special. Don't you look forward to things wiggly on a Saturday night?

From Pepper:

By the way, Donnamaie, I think people NEED alcoholic JELL-O.

Seems an unobtrusive way to get a buzz while looking innocent.

"Don't look now, but Pepper's been hittin' the wigglers again. She's talkin' funny and laughin' like a loon."

"I think you've had enough alcoholic JELL-O, honey, you're dancing with the scarecrow."

"Police officer, I don't have an open container of alcohol in my car."
"Mamn, I can see that, but there is that dish of orange JELL-O on the seat....would you mind walking a straight line for me?"

Didn't even KNOW there was alcoholic JELL-O. Is this only in California? Everything seems a little more exotic out there.

As for the inedible macaroni and cheese, we could roof a house with macaroni and cheese the way I make it. Since I'm building a home in the next year.... (does the health department get involved when you build an edible house?)