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Last Edit April 16, 1999 So there I was, half unconscious, in bed, done for the day. I get up at 5AM - and go until 12-1AM and even as old as I am (we old folk sleep less), that's not really enough so I sometimes grab a coma a little earlier than usual.I was about in one. Between his needing rides to work 3 days a week, to Boy Scouts 1 day per week, Adult school two days a week, his driver education class at 6:30AM daily and my normal job schedule and its commute from hell, I needed sleep! Then the phone rings..... It's my older child calling long distance to tell me, 15 minutes before that event, the Fabio would be on Jay Leno. Now that will cause the blood to flow. But first, I have to decode that it is the Tonight show and that is the one with Jay Leno on it. He was mumbling. Something about his roommate insisting that I be called. So there I go, stumbling down the hall and through the room addition to the fall wall and find, a ha!, my Fabio tape that I have been collecting clips on. I get it into the machine and set up and then sit there. And sit there. My eyes feel like they are filled with sand. I have a stuffy head from pollen. I am barefoot and unrobed. Thank god I am in a knit dress thing I now sleep in. There are no drapes up yet. I am annoyed that I had no warning from his office - did they forget about me? Didn't seem reasonable - I had just spoken to them. Something is fishy here. I wait some more. The monologue ends. I rewind the tape back to the start of this session and wait for the commercial. I think I got it. Fabio himself in an old clip. Previous appearance. What was it on? - 5 seconds? Maybe I didn't. I did get the body double with the wig, wrestling with the parrot in his face. Those, I think to myself, annoyed no end, are not Fabio's hands. No. No. No. He has nice hands. I can forgive his office. I can go to sleep now. My son I will deal with later. * * * Lo and behold, I get to work and someone informs me that he will be on Entertainment Tonight TONIGHT (April 16, 1999) - no time to warn the fans! Maybe I can get home in time for the Midwest...... Glad I have the tape set up. Now, how am I supposed to get any work done? * * * But it gets worse, not better. By the time I get home....the fans are telling ME that he was on Good Morning America! This Morning! Gads! I could have set up a tape guys! What does a woman have to do to get these guys to talk to their webmaster???? I sent out a quick broadcast - need to add about 3 dozen names this week-end to the Fabio mailing list after I mow the lawn and scrub the kitchen floor. And there's the third room with wall-to-wall legos which are leaving my notice as soon as I take the new monitor out of its big box. Two monitors - lots of legos. Big attic space. And I would like to sew - so I can stop going to work in my expensive size 1X wardrobe now that I am a size 12-14. Actually size S bottom, size M top. 1X and XL floats about me when it isn't falling off and size L is marginal. And sometime I'd like to get the new G3 loaded with software and replace the old IIci as my base station. Seems reasonable. So now I am sitting here channel surfing and looking for a tall blond God with whom I have a bone to pick. And waiting. And fending off my sick child who wants to go to the mall. Cough. Cough. Anything to keep me from fussing over Fabio. And wondering when they were planning to tell me about this latest TV fling. The Entertainment Tonight segment fortunately repeated the Good Morning America interview! Yea! And he looks fine - little spot still healing but we were right - he was pissed in those accident pictures and a little shocky. Said it felt like getting hit with a baseball bat. Poor baby! I got it on tape. What's next? Rosie again? Howie? Letterman? Let's see. Ten blank tapes. Three TVs and three VCRs...two of which I control (one is still in its box!). And a goose in a pear tree. Maybe he'll do the View again. No, I am NOT flying to New York. |
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