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Christmas is a holiday - for everyone except the one doing the
cooking.
There are also many other duties and responsibilities
that must be carried out - and when you are a single Mom - you have to
do everything.
First, I was always careful to set-up a nativity
scene and to read stories about the first Christmas. Counter the commercial
crap.
This year I got new wise men and a king. They
are all alone on the coffee table.
Second, I spent week-ends and evenings out
looking at lights - in the mall, on the street. Dragging my kids around
to see lights and color and all that. We would cruise the mall - doing
a lot of looking. I wasn't broke - just living hand to mouth so we didn't
to a lot of buying. That ability came late in life.
This year, my younger son was working at the
mall and coming home tired late at night. (Correction - since he doesn't
drive I had to go fetch him - take 2-3 hours out of my week-end day each
day he worked.) So mall-walking is not very high on his enjoyment list.
And we always went to at least one Carol sing.
And I played Christmas music for a month.
Records that sit dusty and neglected. (Yes,
I said Records.) And now CDs - some still wrapped.
No time. So my son listed to one PBS Christmas
carol sing and played auto music on the new electric piano.
We bought toys and collected side by side
with the Marines - in our uniforms (Cub Scout, Boy Scout) so the kids
would know that Christmas is for sharing.
This year I wrote a check.
When they were younger (and I was broker),
I was the one up at midnight Christmas eve assembling the plastic 3-wheeler
(called "Big Wheels"). I've made several of them over the years.
Thank God, this year, I didn't have to assemble
a bicycle!
I didn't have to make stuffing - I had the
leftover stuffing from Thanksgiving. So grocery shopping was off-kilter.
I kept trying to buy celery and sausage and bamboo shoots and water chestnuts.
And another turkey. Stuff like that.
We aren't eating a whole lot with it (corn
and limas) and there are just two of us (my older son coming later). So
I don't have a lot of bustling around to do.
However, on other Christmas mornings, I would
get up early and bake bread. I made it early in the week this year.
I would fix the pies. Pumpkin, apple, mince.
I tried to get this year's pumpkin pie into the oven by 11. AM that is.
On most years, we would cook the pies, stuff
the turkey, pop it in the oven, and then leave for the movie.
This year - I got the piecrust made (great
piecrust) and then stopped. We went to the movies early. Early.
So much for schedules.
And the bird is frozen.
I left the errant bird in the sink. It was
ice covered and I thought it might help it along.
We watched Galaxy Invaders.
Hilarious.
Once we were allowed in the theater. Seems
this was the very first showing - and they had to run the movie through
to check it before we could get in and they were running late.
So home we go - a little later than planned
(but a funny movie) - and it gets to be 4PM and the two pumpkin pies are
done (we ate one).
We always (correction - I always) had a BIG
turkey so I had leftovers. This year's Christmas bird was 16 lbs.
A small turkey is harder to fix than a big
one! It was frozen - and 1 day on the kitchen counter while I shopped
was not enough! A second day in the refrigerator didn't do it either!
Add 8 hours in the sink being rinsed with hot water on occasion (I know
you aren't supposed to do that). Still not enough! On Christmas morning,
it was still frozen solid!
It's harder to get the neck out of a small
bird. The gizzards are the same size too. Just the bird itself is smaller.
So a frozen bird's legs don't open enough
when it is a small bird and you can't get the neck out to stuff it. So
it isn't just cook it longer. You can't even get it to the oven.
I jiggled its legs. I ran hot water up its.....
No joy.
We waited.
I made my son a sandwich.
We waited.
I got the beast into the oven at 5:30PM. INTO
the oven.
By 10:30 my son was cross-eyed so I cut off
some breast meat, removed the stuffing, and put the bird back in the oven.
It was done at midnight.
We had Christmas dinner by 11PM. A little
late.
So much for traditions.
I have vowed to cook the turkey at midnight
the night before and have it for breakfast next year! Also next year I
am hoping to be in a normal house! With less commuting! With more time
to do the traditional things!
I left the bird sitting overnight - I meant
to get up at 6AM (sure!). By the time I got into the kitchen, the bird
had leaked butter and fat all over the top of my glass-topped new stove.
I spent an hour doing dishes and mopping up
grease and muttering to myself.
I slammed the turkey onto a cookie sheet to
catch any further dripping and into the refrigerator, a feat that required
that I remove a shelf from my refrigerator. It needed cleaning anyway.
Next I attempted to find the gizzard I had
cooked yesterday. I had fed the dog and cats last night with everything
but. The cats are half-feral - especially the new kitten. The gizzard
was gone. I hope I don't step on it. I suspect I won't. Since there are
two of them, they do not horde. They eat.
I did dishes and looked at the laundry hamper.
Egad!
And wrapping paper on the floor.
Yikes!
And the piles of magazines.
Ugh!
And the bills!
Later!
I need to put up the new bedroom drapes.
Tomorrow!
I made low-fat Belgian waffles (crispy) and
fed my child who, at 10:15AM was rolling into his breakfast. (I feed him
in bed. I shouldn't, but it's like poking a hungry bear with a stick.
You'd rather feed them in the cage.)
I made several runs to the end of the house
to prompt him to get out of bed while rounding up towels (he can't possibly
use yesterday's bath sheet). Also to keep him from rolling over onto the
waffles.
He took a 30 minutes shower. I finally banged
on the wall.
Dressing for him was easy - he wore his new
clothes. While he dressed, I made a sandwich for him. Not turkey.
And then I needed to get my son to work. A
feat I didn't accomplish on time since my radiator light flared on in
the Toyota van and I had to quick get the car back to the curb and switch
to the truck, which was out of gas. The child was bellowing in my ear
during this exercise since I was focused on driving (I made a fast U-Turn
while cursing) and getting the car back to ground zero, while mentally
computing that I had no time to get this damned car serviced before the
surgery, which screws up his driving test. I didn't respond to his question
immediately - so he, being a typical male, figured that yelling loudly
in a confined space would demonstrate his dominance.
No. It just gave me another headache.
He was concerned since, in the Toyota van,
we are sitting on the engine. Literally. I told him he should only panic
if I say "Jump for it".
Toyota has already had one service call on
this new "feature" and we don't know if it's a sensor or something really
wrong. I didn't want to risk it.
I will say this.
After that kind of hectic not-quite normal
adventure, I braved the mall. (Since my son was working) on the day after
Christmas.
I went to Victoria's Secret. I was hunting
something. Anything. I found a black silk short tie-front robe and a hot
pink silk button-up top and print hot pink silk pants (size small! They
fit!) With hot pink bands at the bottom that match the top. They were
on two different racks in the store. I am a hunter-gatherer.
Not much else was in the store! I was hunting
silk pajamas. (I am going to have breast-reduction surgery on the 6th
and need button-ups.) There were none in the store.
I said to the clerk at check out, having watched
a beautiful beige printed set of silk pajamas and robe come back - any
silk pajamas in that returns pile? And she found the black ones in size
medium. Tags still intact. I prefer medium tops so the seams don't pull
at the shoulders since I have big ones. Shoulders that is. (The other
big things are leaving.)
"I'll take them," I say. $98.00.
I am in them.
I feel better.
I will have a piece of See's candy for lunch
now.
Two hours of mall-walking allows this.
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