Planning Ahead

Last Edit September 14, 1998

Several women have e-mailed me to thank me for making them laugh. That's very flattering. I think. I'm glad they are entertained. I am trying to entertain myself. I am trying to annoy my children.
I have warned Fabio and his partner, Eric, that I am doing a book - and they'd better look now. (I would say or forever hold your peace but it wouldn't sound right!)
I gave them the opportunity of complaining loudly if they were upset about any of my musings. (Eric, in Little Rock, thought I'd get a novel out of this event! I think I will follow that up.....)
Before Fabio walked into the fan club meeting in San Diego in 1993, and pole-axed my brain, I was originally working on "From the Bottom of my Briefcase," the stories about my boys. I guess I now have two books in process. I haven't figured out what to call the second, the one about stalking Fabio. Not a title that can be repeated anyway. I'm thinking about it.
Several other women wrote that they couldn't believe what I had done. (I couldn't either. Took two weeks to sink in. Guys where I work are shaking their heads. One of the women (from India) thinks he is ugly. (No accounting for taste!) And that "After this date, for $5,000, I will get you a YOUNG man!")
They arrange marriages there.
We have to remind her that HE doesn't get the money and it's for a good cause.
My supervisor keeps asking if I have "done anything." Hmmmmm. Well, I have edited a seminar. Slowly.
My future work associates (I change jobs Oct 5th) ask me if I've come off the clouds yet. (Nooooooo.)
Guys at the scout troop offered FLABIO (one of themselves) for a mere $5,000. And he'd fix the bathroom.
He'd already fixed my sink.
I'll pass. I'll call Roto Rooter again and let them fix their own work.
And, it seems I have inspired other women to cut loose and indulge in their own madness. One women bought a brood mare complete with on-board foal. (She had been looking for the stud Fabio on the web - that's a horse, people!)
Hey! Mine is a charity! That's what I tell my kids anyway.
I owe a LOT of taxes on a stock sale - my only retirement fund.
Make-A-Wish deserves it more than the government!
It's the only excuse I have for cutting loose like that (unplanned)
and IGNORING HIM while I bid. (How on earth....)
I am already getting ready for the "date", which may be in October. That's what Make-A-Wish said. It's what Fabio said. I'm not taking any chances. I'm getting ready NOW.
And the women who egged me on at the auction (All night long. "You're going to do this. I can tell. It's written on your forehead. Oh yes. You are going to do this. Look at you. Your know you are." Etc. Etc. Etc.)
- they are now voting on "the dress".
I almost started a riot at the fabric store.
One is a suit - shawl collar jacket, hit-the-floor skirt with a hit-the-thigh slit, black crepe with a white collar. Very professional looking. My son prefers this one. It will be useful at the sales conference later.
One is some out-of-site fabric - black with a pile but not velvet, I was roaming the store stroking the bolt. It's that seductive. Light-weight silky feel. I want to do a long sleeved wrap dress - one button closure, straight drop to the floor. Elegant. Dangerous.
The third is more daring. If you can get more daring than hanging everything on one button. It's one shoulder, somewhat straight and simple except the top is of the satin side and the bottom of the crepe side of satin-back-crepe in black. The skirt is attached on a bias line. I am adding a to-the-floor sheer black drape off the shoulder. Long gloves. Side zipper.....
I will make all three.( My new job requires I be able to circulate at sales conference parties. At least through the first round or two of drinks. The one-button dress will be sewn shut for that event....)
I am getting ready to sew.
Fabio doesn't stand a chance.......
We are now taking odds on him surviving the limo ride!!!!!!
After all, he said in his commercial that he loves to cuddle.......
I can go along with that....
Actually, I've never molested him.
I've always been carefully polite.
But then, I've never bid at an auction before!!!