Clutch - Brakes - Tires - and Tampons

November 13, 2007 6:02:02 PM
      This all started when, one day, I came home to find that Summer, queen that she is, had evidently become bored. I had left (inadvertently) a box of almost empty tampons on the floor of the bathroom. Boredom does not become her. She has proudly carried them - still in their wrappers - all over the house. Daintily carrying them by their wrapper ends.
      I left them where they lay. The writing group was amused when I told them. Think of the effect of someone walking in on a house, and she got every single room, with tampons scattered hither and yon. I have watched her relocate several, like discarded kittens.

      Well, Summer, the kitten cat ruling the house, has decided as of this morning that a can of Fancy Feast is NOT ENOUGH (it goes thru her like lightning) and started the crying and carrying on within 30 minutes of feeding this morning. When I do NOT respond favorably (like grab a second can), she tears things up.
      My allergy sinus attack (where my head swells up like a balloon and I sneeze hard enough to take my nose off never mind clear my throat - Take one of those Earth-shattering sneezes - multiply by 10-12. Takes about 30 minutes to recover. Lots of nose blowing and spitting and throat clearing and headache. This activity she ignores. I can evidently stumble all over the place with impunity. She just cares about the food. Why else would she JUMP on me while I was sleeping if not that I had over-slept and it was past her feeding time? Why I seldom set the alarm clock.
      She has finally, after a week of tossing them around, discovered she can denude a tampon. Noisily. Laying on her back and using teeth and claws. I now have naked tampons all over my house. Hidden in interesting places. They hook nicely on her trimmed claws, and then they have these nice rat-tails. Great cat toys. I bought myself another box. Trying to keep it out of sight. I have learned to ALWAYS hang up the new roll of toilet paper. None of this "set it on the floor until later" ---- oh no. She cured me of that already.
      She loves to teeth on the cardboard applicator (they are crushed and full of cat teethmarks. The tampons are tucked under counters and across the rugs. The wrappers are also chewed.
      I spent hours finding and rounding them up. Every now and then, another surfaces. Like my missing trouser socks. She has a foot fetish. The dirtier, the better. She rolls on, rubs and will attack my bare feet.
      Never a dull moment.

      I noticed today that my truck clutch pedal is making a strange creaking sound. It was a little creaking sound before - now it is louder and attention-getting. Master/slave for the clutch. Well, I usually blow them in 60,000 miles. This one is 120,000 miles. I have nothing to complain about. Except, I also am near to a brake job. Actually. I should have had one already. I usually am paranoid. And, just for kicks, I also need new Revo tires (My son just did his). The tread is great - but they dry out. (Especialy in 6% humilidy of the Santa Ana winds.) Chuck was having his car washed today (4th time after Burning Man - trying to get the playea dust off of it. Six guys were trying. They really were. Truck looks lots better (still needs a grand scale detailing). Shiny with new tires. I joined him at the Starbuck's/gas station/car wash and he looked at my truck. Said I could get to San Diego and back - but not to wait tooo long - however, after crawling under the seat and the steering wheel, he assured me it is not leaking - at this time. (We had to move the seat back for me to crawl under and peak - I am bigger. Nice one!)
      Good. I want to be in San Diego for the holiday (Thanksgiving) - then come back and refi the house in Fremont - get my finances sorted. Repair the truck. Buy a Prius - no - my company will buy a prius. He has requested game hens for Thanksgiving. I will go find a good recipe. 4 of them. Leftovers. Or cat food. Great - $$$$ for the truck and $$$$$ for the property taxes. All at once. Of course. Cool.
      I grabbed a cafe mocha grande decaf non-fat no-whip with 3 squirts of chocolate not 4 and went back to work - where the meeting I was headed to was canceled. Normal day. Sigh. I need a second job. No, wait. I have a second job. I just need to sell something!