The Trip Home - From Florida

2000

Ron:

Found my missing bar photos - safely hidden for protection. Of course. I should have just treated them like crap and they would have been readily available.

Just so you don't feel bad about your 3.5 hour wait on the return trip (they were trying to keep you balanced - keep you waiting the same delay at each end) - I did not take off at 7:35AM.

I boarded the plane at about 8AM - and sat in a plane with no air conditioning until nearly 9AM. I was already suffering from a bad headache and sore throat from the freezing temperature in the bar and the cigarette smoke (from the meeting with Troy) plus a lack of sleep and this did not help.

First, they had a computer problem at the desk and put too many people on-board. One person too many. Can't fly two-to-a-seat so they needed volunteers.

Then, the ground crew "dropped" the power cable that the plane is hooked up to when parked and everything died - including on-board computers. You also cannot start the plane engines without this cable (jump start). They did this after several "flickering lights" episodes that caught all of our attention. There is something ominous about the sudden silence in a plane holding nearly 200 people.

Then they reconnected to another cable, after they managed to find one, - and remembered to shut the luggage compartment doors.

We were watching. We were also checking the wings. For William Shatner.

And we waited in the heat while they rebooted the plane's on-board computers.

The pilot and first officer occasionally told us (while we sweltered) what was going on. Occasionally.

They were not polite about the desk crew.

They weren't too thrilled with the ground crew either.

We made up a lot of the time (read this as flew like a bat out of hell), had only one or two bouts with turbulence and made it to most connection flights - one was possibly being held for us. I hope so - 'cause the 68 year old man couldn't run with the belligerence I can muster when it is called for. Mom's have practice.

On this next leg - I arrived at the gate (2 gates up) and walked into the boarding line - right behind first class. I do this now with practiced ease.

Right behind the vet with the cane. Note there was no 1 hour wait. Note also that I now looked like a bat out of hell (would not be called the beautiful woman in purple on this trip) so I doubt any sane man or woman would mess with me at this point. Let's just say I wasn't in the "pacify people" mode of the previous seven days. My time of the month was overdue. I was away from coffee. My chocolate was melted. Keep back!

We sat on this plane while the mechanic and supervisor strolled on and off the plane and finally fixed a protruding emergency light bulb with duct tape.

When I got to SJ - my big bag's handle - the only way you roll it - had been smashed.

I staggered to the car (banging my legs all the way and cursing under my breath so I wouldn't be arrested) and found the window had been left open for 10 days - in the garage - lucky me.

I came home to the house from hell - every dish dirty, the animals starving (nearly), laundry abounding, my kid staggering from exhaustion. And most of the food I left untouched. I immediately made two loaves of banana bread to use up over-ripe bananas and the dated milk. I do not waste food.

This project (The Extreme Troy calendar) had better work!!!!! (I am sure it will!)

I will add your tale of woe to my story package.

Maybe I'll send this on to the FAA.

Let's see. Boycott MD-80s, TWA, America West and Delta.

Can't wait for the flight to Vegas next week.