2000
| SUNDAY July 30, 2000 Last night was the night from hell. If I thought them sitting him up on a hard mat to do the spinal Thursday was bad (tore him up - no donut for him to sit on) - the after effects were worse. And some dear doctor came through and decided that he should cut back on pain medication. The tearing (all mucus tissue is affected by chemo) was so bad that he had blood in his shorts. Some where around 7PM he started screaming. The pain was that bad. This child could have had his arm severed and not noticed - he was noticing this. If he was screaming it was serious. I began to bounce off walls. I had them call the doctor on call. I came out three times to see how fast he was walking. Took 5 injections. Took two hours to get him off the ceiling and not have him cry out. How do you leave the room when you child has tears running down his face and is crying out in pain. He about bent the bed rails. I stayed with him all night. I have TWO jobs - the Jettison book/calendar and my regular one - and a commute from hell. So I can't stay overnight at the hospital - not often. And the insurance is our lifeline so not working is not an option. Neither is his dropping out of college. Insurance only covers college kids after age 19. I did stay over this Saturday night and my back is now out. Something about a hard plastic mattress in the corner of the room your child is in. I shared this "adventure" with another mother who had the following comment: "Quite often, we being the mother-bears of our children must step in to help. There were many times I had to instruct the nurses. As well as getting more meds in a timely fashion. For Pain they have the notion if the patient does not ask they won't give. Boy howdy are they on the ball in the middle of the night for vitals (which are right after the patient finally has relief from the pain and is asleep)." Yep. Seems that way. I can't even touch his feet - he reacts to scent (I died my hair) - and he has mood swings (side effects). It's a mess all way round. I need to be there - he wants me there - he stresses too much when I am. My son is such a sweetheart normally that he was the darling of the ward - hugs everyone - can't now. He is very polite (the pain had him swearing) and normally so dear. My escape at home is a glass of wine and a Jane Austin period-piece video (Sense and Sensibility, Pride and Prejudice, etc.) I am supposed to drink two glasses red wine a day - HDL bad cholesterol One I can handle (had three the other night - five-hour PBS version of Sense and Sensibility - 20 years old - my escape. I was still awake at 3AM.) I just did 2 hours in the gym this morning (he insists that I go), bought (ordered) him a box spring and frame and headboard (5-7 days) to replace the captain's bed) Bought a ton of sheets (change the bed daily?) And a new "bed in a bag) bed set - looks nice And a tiger skin pillow. Power-shopping. A writer friend sent leopard pillow covers The bed set is plaid - and every thing keys off of it. Manly stuff. Then I got him baby food And I am about to eat my lunch/dinner, go get ice cream and drive back - he eats Hagen Daas (I don't know if I spelled that right). I also spent two hours and laid out the complete ad for the October issue of StarLog. TWO HOURS!!! And I like it. I'll take it to him to see. That and a ton of videos. We sit and watch movies together. Distraction. Anything for distraction. |
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