Christmas Muddle - 2002

Date: December 25, 2002
OK - It's Christmas Day.     
      I was up until 3AM baking the Christmas bread - which is small ("MOM - it's usually huge! But I'm not hungry-----")
      Oh good.
      And then got up at 8AM to make Pumpkin pie (it was 9 before I made it).
      I needed to ice the bread. I was waundering around the kitchen, aimless. I needed real coffee.
      First, I found two empty bottles of lemon extract - and no almond extract in sight. If you open a bottle - use it at once because---- it evaporates.
      Then I found two unopened bottles of lemon - after having dumped vanilla into the icing. Vanilla makes the icing off-white. Almond and lemon keep it white.
      I added some lemon.
      Powdered sugar, Crisco (a lump of) and beat smooth. If you use butter, it is off-white. Crisco is pure white. The recipe is 1-2 tablespoons of shortening to about a box (1/2 to a full one), 1/2 teaspoon flavoring and a dab of milk. Add a teaspoon of milk at a time and beat like mad --- when the consistency of soft butter - it's icing. Warm it up gently to dribble over things. It will re-harden. Fast.
      So next - melt it in the microwave to dribble over the bread.
      I did one. Without almond, it's not the same. I like that flavor. It zings.
      By the time I have put sprinkles on it, the icing had re-solidified.
      So I re-warmed it in the microwave. Being careful that the dishwasher and the garbage disposal and the electric dishwasher (all on the same circuit as the microwave) were off. Because I did not want to run outside in the cold yet again to re-set their breaker. (My kitchen was wired by the former owner - the handyman from hell).
      I got distracted, and watered the poinsettia and the amaryllis. While forgetting to check the melting.
      Whoops. The icing is toast. Or crystals. Yuck.
      So I made a new batch - lemon flavor only - and finished icing the bread.
      Mind you, I had also dropped things, forgotten things, stumbled a bit, was generally disoriented from exhaustion. Like the day before, when I ran to the bank, stood in line (20 people deep), got to the window, and realized I had left the deposit (and Visa payment) in the car! Another line wait was required!
      I had a small piece (very) of my bread and my morning coffee. Out of Starbuck's bottled stuff, I had instant real and decaf mixed.
      I gave myself a hot flash.
      Whoa! Haven't had one for quite awhile - but the estrogen is on a down-spiral on purpose. And I am normally reactive to real coffee. (I can handle the Light Mocha at Starbucks but only 1 per day.)
      I rush to change into shorts and tank ---- in cold weather!
      My younger son got up and is stumbling around - out of bed before noon he can't function
      I am getting ready to find a turkey breast recipe to compare to what we are about to do------
      I can't find the squeeze-bulb end of the baster - I had two bottoms (because I threw one away) but I can't find the top! My son is laughing at me.
      That's because it's on the cup rack in plain sight.
      What a way to start.
      My son dances me around the kitchen. He is up!
      OK. Now we are to do the breasts.
      The wrapper had directions. The breasts have pop-ups!
      I find recipes.
      And we make up our own. He is a bit tired and weak, but he helps.
      One large onion per breast. Shoved up inside.
      Sliced cloves (two) of elephant garlic per breast.
      Cut-up carrot (1 each breast).
      I forgot celery.
      Add garlic powder.
      Allspice.
      Bay leaves (two per breast).
      Rosemary.
      Seasoned salt.
      Once upended (upright) in the pan (two breasts fill a pan), add pepper, red pepper, more garlic, more seasoned salt, more rosemary, poultry seasoning and five strips of bacon.
      More garlic (Elephant) sliced on the top and wrap in foil (tent).
      Bake - about 2-3 hours at 325. (Actually - longer.)
      I also toss the frozen turkey leg into a loaf pan (wrapped in foil and coated with the frozen left-over turkey juice from the Thanksgiving feast).
      It will go into the oven later.
      I debate. One white potato and three yams?
      My pies are out. The "scrap pie" (leftover filing) I have warm with Redi-Whip on it. A piece that is. Very thin pie.
      Not as good as cold when the flavors blend.
      But good.
      I fix leftover bacon and eggs for breakfast. I burned the bacon. Or. it was real crisp------
      My son wants eggnog - but we don't have rum flavoring - and no rum.
      And there is the question of raw eggs.
      We think about it for later.
      My son settles down for Ice Age. He watches the second DVD which is full of extra stuff, including worse adventures for Scrat - as if there were worse adventures. Wiley Coyote in the Ice Age.
      My son is in gales of laughter at every bad thing that happens to the little creature.
      Slap stick.
      By 1PM we hear from my older son and his father, my ex. He (my son) just woke up. So,..... the turkey breast will be done when he gets here. He had a migrain (clusters have no treatment).
      I run to polish silver. And splash cleaner on my top.
      And put potatoes inside of the foil tent. (Don't do that - they don't cook fast that way.)
      And stick the Turkey eg in the oven.
      My younger son is restless.
      He wants presents.
      I let him open a few small ones from Pepper.
      Two of mine and two of his.
      He doesn't want to wait.
      Even though he has few surprises, he has a few.
      By about 2:30 the other guys wander in.
      I am in a top (third clothing change) and long shorts.
      I have purchased two more stacking chairs - I had one - plus my desk chair.
      We move the table.
      I have set it with silver and china.
      I have set out side dishes - pickles, cranberry, raw carrots, veggies, potatoes and yams I remove from the oven and nuke.
      I pull out the potatoes and yams and nuke them.
      We are waiting and waiting for the poppers to pop - and give up and yank the turkeys out.
      I hack up one breast and heat the gravy from Thanksgiving with some cream of chicken soup.
      I nuke the leftover stuffing.
      Voila.
      Dinner.
      Everything was fine ---- except the pie (the big one) was not fully cooked - so I had to put it back in the oven. I had been in too much of a hurry to get the turkeys in. (Ah --- I do miss the luxury of two ovens. My mother always had two ovens.)
      My x and older son left without having any pie. (It's 1/3 gone already). I had pie and Redi whip. And it was very, very good. If my eldest is returning in a day or two (with my present),
      Of course food was coming out as fast as I put it in!!!! Love upset stomachs on the holidays!!! It's the coffee. The hot flash should have warned me. In this case, good! Less recovery for the diet.
      I have a toaster and crock pot, a book from my x, my eldest forgot my present - French Perfume from FRANCE no less, a mini flashlight (mine broke) - hangs on my key chain (from my youngest), chocolate (Pepper, you bad bad girl!!!!!!!), I laughed out loud that the Wonder woman thing - I won't unwrap the shrink wrap on that. I also have a Medical Bloopers calendar my younger son got me.
      My youngest had wireless earphones, games he bought himself, video and PlayStation game from my x, leather gloves from me - I can't tell if they are too big or not, and thinsulin gloves too, a turtleneck sweater, his gadget can opener, a big magnum flashlight, a coffee maker and a pin-up calendar he picked out. Arty pin-ups - 40's art style. I forget what else.
      My eldest I gave an expensive 80Gig hard drive and thinsulin gloves, a candle, a wine bottle opener, coffee paks (we drank one), a black turtle neck sweater, my x gave him one of those eyeball cameras for his computer. I sent him home with all the bread.
      My x I gave a candle. These are gel candles, scented, Ocean Spray), and a big package of Old Spice stuff - a sort of in joke. Don't know what to get a man - get aftershave and soap on a rope.
      More importantly, my eldest son (drafted as system admin whenever he arrives) fixed my computer-printer problem. YEA!!!! I put the downloaded files in a folder this time for future use.
      I took photos.
      Having seen the Thanksgiving photo (my God I look like a heifer) I dodged that honor.
      The boys (father and son) were tired and left together.
      Once everyone had left, Little Bit was walking around like a new arrival - sitting near us!! And rubbing herself on my feet.
      She is the Christmas cat - since we got her back inside on Christmas eve.
      The nurses are not getting my truffles!!!!! (My precious! Which, if I eat, I will look like Golum.)
      Oh well.
      The turkey is packaged, the trash taken out, I am exhausted. Chemo at 12 tomorrow.
      Gym? I need to get there!! In the morning.
      I wasn't "overeating" - but I did eat.
      Back to the no carb routine.
      I can reach my sneakers to tie them so yes, it WAS working.
      I am working this week (part of the week) and next instead of being off. So movies will be this weekend. The yard work will wait.
      Onward and upward. And hopefully not outward.